A second person has suggested that I edit 'Born To Return The Gift' by putting more of the information contained in the last fifty pages into the beginning of the book to give readers a clearer idea of the main character - Nyima Chante Robbins. It would make her more likable and easier for the reader to understand why she is the way she is I'm told.
Although he stated the story was a powerful one, he felt it needed an overhaul.
My response? If it had been written thus, it would not have satisfied my intent. I understand that writers who want to sell books write according to public demand, but everyone's first book was a story waiting to be told.
I established a character and then show her melt down. During her two week stay in a hotel, she recounts her seven year hiatus in California and is haunted by a recurring nightmare. Her actions and reactions are indicative of one on the verge of spiraling completely out of control . . . but although the situation is pathetic (alone, homeless, unstable employment, self-medicating) she is not meant to collapse into total mental despair and resort to the addictive behavior of her past because she gathers her strength from God and stands on faith.
Depressed people often have racing thoughts that reconstruct bad memories. In 'Born To Return The Gift' this is reflected through flashbacks of people, jobs, and situations that have left indelible marks on her well being. The memories demonstrate the correlation of how difficult it is for one to move beyond a troubled past when the same kind of experiences are experienced in their present.
Although he stated the story was a powerful one, he felt it needed an overhaul.
My response? If it had been written thus, it would not have satisfied my intent. I understand that writers who want to sell books write according to public demand, but everyone's first book was a story waiting to be told.
I established a character and then show her melt down. During her two week stay in a hotel, she recounts her seven year hiatus in California and is haunted by a recurring nightmare. Her actions and reactions are indicative of one on the verge of spiraling completely out of control . . . but although the situation is pathetic (alone, homeless, unstable employment, self-medicating) she is not meant to collapse into total mental despair and resort to the addictive behavior of her past because she gathers her strength from God and stands on faith.
Depressed people often have racing thoughts that reconstruct bad memories. In 'Born To Return The Gift' this is reflected through flashbacks of people, jobs, and situations that have left indelible marks on her well being. The memories demonstrate the correlation of how difficult it is for one to move beyond a troubled past when the same kind of experiences are experienced in their present.
(Spoiler Alert ) The subconscious compulsion to repeat experiences through dreams or waking/walking nightmares is evident as the protagonist attempts to retroactively master and gain control over how she reacts to her circumstances and the choices she's made, while her spiritual side is reconciling past traumas with a healthy 'anticipatory fear', the absence of which was the cause of her (repressed memory) childhood molestation.
The descriptive narrative at the beginning is an objective, albeit morally ambiguous POV and is offset by a prescriptive narrative during the last fifty pages as the nightmare unfolds, which tells the protagonist's story from an almost authorial divinity POV through a confessional while in the devil's tomb.
Onyz Production's mission is to intrigue the mind, prick the heart, and incite the spirit. 'Born To Return The Gift' is a story that can provoke a reader to cast judgment against a protagonist they don't quite know or understand. But by the end, in judging her the reader cannot escape their own self-check of reality.
Do you think this book should be unpublished or redone? I'd like to hear your comments.
Do you think this book should be unpublished or redone? I'd like to hear your comments.
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